'Fields of innocence' is a beautiful song by evanescence which talks of your innocence when you were still a child. You're looking at your past from your present teenage or adult age. Have I truly traded my heart for the real world ? We all have. We have to. I don't know how cruel or bad the real world is. I don't know if I'm changing in any way. It feels so different when I'm in my new environment. You'll think about all these when there are differences between you and the people around you. Even my best pals have changed. I dare not say I have not. Sadly though, I wish people and things around me don't have to change quickly.

Sometimes I don't understand either how anyone could treat their newly met friends better than a close friend whom you've known for more than 5 years. Why the sudden change ?

Thank god things in class isn't so competitive. Yes there are too many intelligent people in class. I have made little effort in staying in the same calibre as my class is. It's worrying. The mere mention of tests and exams gets me quiet and stressed. I don't want to think of how many more years till I'm free of all these. That was a bad habit I had in secondary school - always counting the months till O level ends. I guess school never really started for me. I hope things don't go so bad. I really don't wish to see the day where I have to take forward modules.

High fever. Then fever for 3 days - today's the 4th. It's maddening that I had to miss medical checkup last Saturday because of that. I had wanted to get that over and done with. I had 2 nights thinking about blood tests. Don't mock at me. Some people tend to be afraid of needles especially when it's been so long since I had an injection. But really. Now I have to skip 2 saturday water trainings. Well its not on purpose for sure. And I would not mind going for training tomorrow but I haven't fully recover yet. I must recover fully before Friday. Damn, my body immune system is weak. Oh yes, Wednesday's SYFC interview, I passed it. It was pretty nerve wrecking. Especially waiting for that call on Thursday morning. Watched 'The Dark Knight' after the interview to ease my mind.

Projects after one another. wtf? what's up with this term. Suddenly all projects come shooting. I'm not complaining. Just wondering a little here as to why it all came suddenly. IDEAS 3 boards project have been put on hold today. Thank god.

Now focusing on another 'marketing and innovation' project that is really a damn big deal to us all. Couldn't think or contribute much. Still sick. I'm glad to do the designing and content alignment of the presentation though.

My fucking XP gave me problem again. It's completely dead and needs to be re-installed. Thank my mom for the external harddisk she bought for me to backup my data. My 2nd best friend now. I just love the extra humongous space.

I need new music. Can't wait for september. Especially britney's comeback single. She is ready to take on the world I tell you.

Farhan